Ready, Set, Mingle!

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Thursday which we call here in Manhattan is Thirstdays.  Celebrate that the weekend is approaching. Opportunistic time to go to an afterwork networking/social event and meet others of the opposite sex that have similar interests and drive as you. Three months out from my divorce, I have attended a few of these events. Now might you ask…..”Are you ready to get out there aren’t you still coping?” And my response as I would say to anyone with my angelic smile….”Why of course…can’t be dwelling on what didn’t work forever” While secretly I am like “Hell Yeah!”. Thursday evenings are reserved for my dating life…which includes networking or of sheer luck an actual date. Babysitter reserved, nails done, and dressed in one of my more sexually appealling work attire outfits I am all set. Now being a little seasoned in how this rolls….it typically starts off with me ecstatic to see my single girlfriends which provides me ease that no matter what happens in my free couple of hours, I will have a great time hanging with and catching up with the chicas. As a divorcee in her 30s, in this city with plenty of single women who are also in my age range and lets just say dont have any liabilities to tend to but themselves….two words: “competition” and “challenge”.  Where “challenge” is not exclusive to the women but also to the men you meet. Often at these venues I meet either the 1) single approaching 30 year-old who is beginning to think he wants a serious relationship but has limited dating experience 2) the mid-30 to early 40-year-old that has never been married, wants a family but has a too independent lifestyle which makes them clueless on how to put forth the effort or 3) the divorcee or single dad who is enjoying post-singlehood too much that I have to question when do they spend time with their children. While these are usually the 3 options, I am always optimistic that there is a diamond in the rough out there who may fall in either of these buckets but is willing to put the effort to shine out from his category. Conversely, if not successful in meeting that gent I am able to meet a possible business connect or friend. So I flash my smile, work the room and start up a conversation. Past initial physical attraction, agreement of some similarities through small talk between myself and a gent, there is always the question of “status”. What is your status??? Now prior to the completion of my divorce when I met my girls as a stress outlet, I cringed when that question was presented. Seriously, who wants to meet someone who is going through the works of a divorce? Translation: She is not really available and is unstable. Now, while not quite reveling in my defined status I look forward to saying I am single and divorced….a better option of the two.  However, that still poses challenges. I still see a slight disappointment that I am not single without any attachments whatsoever or I meet the sleazeballs that are elated and think I am in search for just a good time.  However, I will say every now and then I do meet a true gent that is open to exploring the possibility of dating a divorcee. That is the encouraging part….I guess that is why I look forward to my Thursday mingle nights and getting out there. What is the worst that could happen….I meet new people and enjoy a couple of cocktails with my girlfriends. Not a bad alternative.

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4 thoughts on “Ready, Set, Mingle!”

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