Should there be a website that provides an outlet for wives to exploit their husband’s mistresses? If so, should husbands create one too?
While watching the morning news recently, there was an expose about a trending website where wives can exploit their spouse’s mistresses. Wives post pictures of the women their husbands have allegedly had an affair with. Purpose is to defame the woman’s character…. Basically put the woman on a “watch list” as if she is a sexual predator and a danger to her neighborhood. In my opinion implying: “Beware fellow wives within a 30 mile radius! There is a willing adulteress participant in the area. Make sure you keep your roving eye husband close… Because he will not be able to contain himself.”
I was intrigued by this expose….and thought I would share my thoughts. This website was the brainpower of a wife and mother who was allegedly cheated on by her husband. Her hurt by her husband’s infidelity escalated to such a point that she believes she is doing a greater good to the community by exploiting the “other woman” and rallying others to do the same.
I personally feel that the website is nonsense and these are my 4 reasons why:
1) The website does not expose the husbands, just the mistresses. It takes two to tango. He is just as much guilty if not more than the “other woman”.
2) Most of the times the mistress is just as much of a victim of circumstance as the wife. Not speaking of all women who contributed to an infidelity act with a married man. But, many times they are not aware, or are under the assumption as a result of tales by the husbands that the marriage dissolution is imminent or they are separated but really aren’t. And if that is not the case, the husband is preying on a woman whom lacks the self esteem to believe she is worthy enough of finding a man that is not taken. Yes, there are the women whom are the instigators and are spiteful in their attempt to break a marriage. But many are not. And so be it if they are… It still takes two to tango so expose the husband too…. If that is what you feel is going to heal your heart. Which I still don’t agree with as noted in my other points below.
3) What about the children involved… And if not yours what about theirs? How will airing your dirty laundry impact your kids view of their father or the mistress that he ended up leaving you for? Is that a healthy environment? Despite your discontent with each other…. Keep it between the adults. And I know who cares about the mistresses kids and family, right? Are we as women so self-indulged in our own pain of betrayal and that inconsiderate, we want others to feel the same hurt including children that are involved?
4) Who are we to cast a stone and defame a person because of their lack of judgment? Yes, as a wife you do feel humiliated and betrayed. But face the true source…your husband who gave you his oath and cited the wedding vows with you. He is the one who humiliated and betrayed you. If you forgave him and chose to move forward with your marriage, I personally believe you should at least forgive the other woman who did not make any commitments or promises to you. Put it in God’s hands and let him judge.
Exploiting someone else will not ease your heart in the long-term. It may provide a rush at the moment, that you sought revenge. But it is just as vengeful and wrong in my opinion as the alleged act committed by your husband and his partner. I believe letting yourself to forgive provides true healing. Now forgiveness does not equate to staying together. If that is a woman’s deal breaker to end a marriage, so be it. But forgiving is imminent to move forward with your life.
Now that is my opinion and my thoughts. I would like to hear other thoughts and views of whether there should be a website to expose adulteress, if so should you expose both parties? Should husbands have the same outlet? If not why, do you agree or disagree with my reasons?