Is Ashley Madison (Infidelity Dating Site) Interfering With Your Marriage?

Ashley Madison or, is the number one dating site where married people can explore and meet other similarly attached individuals who are willing to explore a possible affair. The site’s tag line:

“Life Is Short. Have An Affair”




Intent to commit adultery is as easy as a click of the mouse. Your spouse no longer has to leave the house to not only look at eye candy, but can have a consensual affair with someone who has an equal amount of risk and like-minded deception.

The online dating and adult site industry makes it easier for one to satisfy built up sexual curiosities. While one may have every intention to be a faithful and devoting husband/father or a doting and loyal wife/mother, many married people have unmet desires and needs. Lives become hectic, time to rekindle the relationship is not made a priority or some people should have never gotten married in the first place. Prior to the internet age, significant effort would be required to commit adultery. There was elevated risk in smudging your reputation and breaking up your family. There was more scheming and dishonesty, where the unwed side piece would likely be in the dark of their partner’s “marital status”. Depleting the family savings in exchange of satisfying fantasies with escorts and/or spoiling your mistress/gigaloo to ensure they are content with their limited role.



My Introduction To Ashley Madison:

I met Ashley Madison via an email on my then husband’s computer about a year and a half into our marriage. At the time my son was really young, so Saturdays were relatively relaxed, no extra curricular activities….dedicated to A.M. gym time in Arlington, VA, house cleaning and putting the finishing touches on our not yet settled in home in the nation’s capital. Not a snoop, but my husband’s email account was glaring at me while I was cleaning the table….well I couldn’t help but to take a peak. Guilty! Well, let’s just say he was not always the best in keeping stuff stashed away. I saw a sender named Ashley Madison….I didn’t click on the email…but internally wondering who is this Ashley chick. Is this a co-worker? Well, I knew he had female friends at work. I mean we both have platonic friends of the opposite sex. Not a big deal…no need to make an issue of it. A few days go by and well his computer was again on the kitchen table with his email account glaring in my face. Well this time, I decided to scroll down to see recent email receipts….Surprise! There she is again, Ashley, Ashley and Ashley! Who is this bold chick just sending emails to my husband? Well my “auditor” hat came on. With my auditing and accounting background…time to go to work. This is what I do best. So I clicked and saw that there were reference matches and likes to his profile. Profile for what? The website was glaring on the bottom…so I clicked on and was introduced to “Ashley Madison”.  Who would of knew…”.a hookup site for married people”.



The Confrontation:

Later that afternoon, husband just finished cutting the grass and was about to change clothes to go out for a run at the Mall in D.C. Well, me being me…I can’t keep my lips tight for too long. Yep, I am a Snoop… and I caught you! Ha! Next time don’t be so careless with your personal stuff. Well after interrogating him on why he was on a “hook up” site and not understanding why. Well, I knew I wasn’t slacking on my wifely understandably there was a big question mark over my head. He proceeds to say how he heard about the website from a friend and he was just curious to see what it was about. Okay…I could get that…curious means you click on the website not create a username!!! Well he assured me he did not act on it, but was curious about the type of people who were on it. Whatever! I will say from my investigating…the emails received from Ashley were constant reminders of possible matches. Thus he was not being responsive. He got a pass…for now. However, at that point the “naive” wife left the marriage. I graduated from “Snoop” to “Certified Snoop”. Watch your back! After my snooping efforts led me to dead ends…I eventually retired my “Snoop” hat. Retrieving it only when stories became fishy.

romney_ashley_madison (1)

Hello Ashley Madison Again!

Towards the latter part of our marriage, I was re-introduced to Ashley. This chick just won’t leave us alone. This time we were in his email together trying to retrieve a bill or receipt can’t remember…well of course I pointed out the “Ashley Madison” email. At this point, no snooping needed…I am not going to exert all of my energy trying to put the puzzle together. We have issues, we are not happy….we are together for our children and we don’t want to fail at our marriage. It is only a matter of time…if no one is willing to put forth the effort. Hmmm….maybe I should create an account……….

 Has Ashley Madison  or other Adult-Dating/Viewing Sites Interfered With Your Marriage? If So How Did You Handle It?


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