Now I advocate fostering a positive co-parenting relationship. For the most part I get it right. But there are times I become completely frustrated. The battle of managing our parenting with our newly “fabulous” single lives.
In the divorce decree, we have decided that we alternate every other summer holiday weekend and New Year’s eve. Or….he has every New Year’s eve to soak in his new “bachelor” status. So this year, I have Memorial Day Weekend and July 4th Weekend away from the kids. Their father has Labor Day and of course New Year’s Eve. I have all of the other holidays every year….just because I am more into the traditional holidays than him. So to ensure my sprouts have memorable childhood moments during Christmas and Thanksgiving..they are with me.
So today for instance, I decide to buy concert tickets for July 3rd evening to celebrate with friends, one who is having their birthday. The concert is to be after work in upper Manhattan near Dyckman. St. I invited my girlfriend that lives a bit away from New York to stay over. I assume that since he has the kids he will pick them up the night before July 4th as they are going away on a beach trip. Well…I guessed wrong. Their father just assumed he would pick them up sometime on July 4th. HUH???? And by the way he has plans. Hmmm….I wonder if his plans are similar to mine? That would be awkward. Afterall it is a popular concert…at New York City’s most popular urban summer venue. My face went blank. Why would he assume that? When I have the kids on Labor Day and on Memorial Day I assume the Monday would be mine too including the night before and that night. I just took the Sprouts on a week long vacation a month ago. This is his planned vacation with them…that he has been talking about for months.
Go Figure! It frustrates me….because as I do have primary custody, so therefore I have to figure out a Plan B and he can come and pick up and drop off as he pleases. This is not the only battle we have. The time he picks up the kids and drops them off on his free weekend, there he assumes that I have no plans again so I can be accommodating. Where he has time to hang out on a Friday night and pick them up later and drop them off on Sunday so he can catch the 9pm NBA game or final football game out in the city.
Thus I just finished a text battle…and it included expletives and threats. Yes, I am not perfect. Of course he is being obstinate and not budging or trying to mollify.
Like marriage, friendships, co-parenting two people don’t always see eye-to-eye. This is one of those days…that I am sticking my middle finger out to him through my phone.