Know The Facts: 7 Sad-But-True Reasons He’s Going To Cheat On You

The topic of men and fidelity has been a topic I have been thinking a lot about lately…. The Main Chick vs. Side Chick Phenom is glaring in our faces through social media and entertainment outlets.  In the courting/dating stage, habits of the way men approach dating, tend not to wane until the engagement, make one or two a priority and have a couple of side chicks to call upon. I thought this article from YourTango.com was very insightful. Nothing that I was not aware of before, but organized in a great way to really put the whole Men and Fidelity into perspective. In a nutshell, A Man Is As Faithful As His Options. Beware of that Dreamy Charming Guy “The Hunter and Gatherer” make sure he has strength against temptation, while he may have good intentions there are always someone to test him. However, it goes both way for us women…but the reasons a woman cheats is very different from a man. Well enjoy!

o-MEN-CHEAT-facebook
Do you think you could tell before it happened to you?

Wouldn’t it be great to have a crystal ball that would allow you to see into the future and know whether or not he’s going to cheat on you? With the unfortunate reality being that 55% of divorces cite cheating as one of the causes, it’s clearly one of the most common reasons marriages split.

Until one of us finds that crystal ball (and please share if you do), it helps to understand the reasons men cheat, and from there you’ll have a much better chance of avoiding that kind of heartbreak down the road.

So why, exactly, do men cheat? Especially when it seems like everything’s going so well?

All too often we blame ourselves, and when everything’s done we feel like there’s something wrong with us. Well, the good news is that it’s not you – it’s him.

While both men and women cheat (although they don’t always agree on what exactly constitutes cheating), men typically cheat for very different reasons.

There are many of them, but these are some of the most common:

1. He’s too hot.

He’s the guy you’ve always dreamed of. He’s confident. He’s charming. He’s good looking (or at least not bad looking).

Bottom line: he’s got lots of opportunities.

Often he’s the one being approached. It’s not so much that he was out looking to cheat, but when something’s right there for the taking … well, it’s hard for most men to say no.

2. It really is all about the sex.

You’ve got him cornered and he’s pleading for forgiveness, saying it meant nothing to him and it was only sex. Guess what? He’s being honest.

For men it really is about the sex.

According to a 2011 study by psychologist Barry Kuhle, when confronted with a cheating partner women generally wanted to know if their partner was in love with the other woman, whereas men wanted to know specifics about the sexual act itself.

Bottom line: Men like sex. A lot.

3. He cheats because he can.

Today, more than ever, there are lots of women that are more than willing to help me cheat. Women cheat nearly as often as men. Even websites like AshleyMadison and AffairsClub make it very easy to pull off affairs (and keep it very discreet).

The other woman is only a click away, and there are plenty of them.

4. He wants to have sex with other women.

It’s pretty much considered common wisdom that men are biologically wired to want to mate with lots of different women.

Men want to spread their seed. It’s a biological truth. Men also love the chase, and want to conquer. Often it’s just to see if they can get her in bed — the classic “notch on the bedpost” situation.

Unfortunately, they don’t grow out of it.

5. He knows he’ll probably get away with it.

Or at least you’ll forgive him.

This is especially true if you’ve caught him in a few “little white lies” before and you’ve let him get away with it. It’s a slippery slope, and if he knows that you’ll forgive him for that small indiscretion, then he’s likely to try something bigger (or at least feel like he’s got a good chance at being forgiven).

And if he’s cheated on you (or a past partner) before, it’s much more likely that he’ll cheat again.

6. You’re not really right for each other.

We all get into relationships for various reasons, and most often it’s what we believe is a “spark”, or chemistry that makes us feel like we just “know” he’s the one.

But the truth is that these feelings are usually just a mixture of our programming, insecurities and anxiety masked as “butterflies”. We want to  tame that bad boy. We want to reign in the womanizer.

Yes, a real ladies men are very magnetic (as most of us know all too well), but remember, he’s had a lot of ladies, and it’s a really hard habit to break.

7. His friends are cheaters.

His friends do it, and they’re good guys, right? Maybe his dad did it, and he’ll always look up to Dad. The more he’s surrounded with people who have cheated, the more “normal” (and thus acceptable to his moral system) it becomes.

While these are all possible reasons a man might turn to cheating, it doesn’t mean that every guy that fits any or all of these is cruising AshleyMadison while you’re sleeping. But, as always, knowing what to look out for can go a long way.

And the best way to keep him from straying?

Always do your part to keep your relationship healthy. Then make sure you’re living and loving your own very best life (just in case).

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s