5 Brutal Truths About Loving A Taurus (As Written By A Taurus)

Hello it is Taurus Season!!! I am a Taurus to the core. Those who know me well…..know that I am all of these 5 Truths… Plus the Loyal part! That is always the Plus…if you can cope with the 5 truths. Thought I share this article I saw on YourTango.com
taurus_sexuality_traits_and_characteristics
The good, the bad, and the Taurus-ey.

Continue reading 5 Brutal Truths About Loving A Taurus (As Written By A Taurus)

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The #1 Thing Smart Women Do To Attract (And Keep) Amazing Men

This was a great read from YourTango.com. I find myself absolutely guilty of being assertive and wanting to have control in relationships…which I will admit has not always left a positive outcome. Enjoy!

Continue reading The #1 Thing Smart Women Do To Attract (And Keep) Amazing Men

Know The Facts: 7 Sad-But-True Reasons He’s Going To Cheat On You

The topic of men and fidelity has been a topic I have been thinking a lot about lately…. The Main Chick vs. Side Chick Phenom is glaring in our faces through social media and entertainment outlets.  In the courting/dating stage, habits of the way men approach dating, tend not to wane until the engagement, make one or two a priority and have a couple of side chicks to call upon. I thought this article from YourTango.com was very insightful. Nothing that I was not aware of before, but organized in a great way to really put the whole Men and Fidelity into perspective. In a nutshell, A Man Is As Faithful As His Options. Beware of that Dreamy Charming Guy “The Hunter and Gatherer” make sure he has strength against temptation, while he may have good intentions there are always someone to test him. However, it goes both way for us women…but the reasons a woman cheats is very different from a man. Well enjoy!

Continue reading Know The Facts: 7 Sad-But-True Reasons He’s Going To Cheat On You

If There Is Nothing On This Finger You Don’t Get Claimed! Taraji Henson speaks to Steve Harvey!

Following the rapid success of Fox TV television series “Empire” coming to it’s first season finale, actress Taraji Henson visited the Steve Harvey show and spoke about her stance on relationships. Continue reading If There Is Nothing On This Finger You Don’t Get Claimed! Taraji Henson speaks to Steve Harvey!

TIMING!!!!

“Chemistry. If You Have Chemistry. You Only Need One Other Thing. Timing.”

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So I ask a guy friend: Why would you jeopardize a potential promising relationship with a woman that meets all of your requirements,   have an instant click with that has your best interest in mind?

His Answer: TIMING! Why would a guy stop his fun before he is ready for it to stop. There are plenty of fish in the sea….For a guy to stop his fun, he has to be ready for a relationship.

This is not the first time hearing this….

Last week a discussion with another guy friend. I wanted feedback on his experience with dating me….so I can find ways to improve myself.

His Feedback: Your a great person with wonderful qualities.

My Rebuttal: I have heard that from men before…If I have such wonderful qualities, why did we stop dating?

His Answer: TIMING!

Moral of the story: If you want an exclusive relationship with someone that will prosper into a happy ending. Ask the right questions. See where they are at in life, in terms of career, wanting a family and building an empire with someone.

Fact Check: Now I know men don’t want to hear this… If the guy is telling you what they want you to here….do your research. Pay attention to their actions. Consistency is key. Is he opening up about his life, is he bringing you into his life. Are you seeing the gent on the weekends and weekdays?

Demand Honesty: You do not want to be the chick on his “Rotation Belt of Women”. A true dude will tell you if he is in search of a relationship or not. It is up to you to want to continue to pursue more from him than what he is willing to give or just move yourself from his Chess Game and develop a platonic friendship.

Many times when you meet a great gent that shows genuine interest but doesn’t want to pursue a relationship, it really is all about “TIMING”.

The “Playdate” Date! What to Expect!

As a divorcee with kids, your dating prospects includes those with and without kids.  Your kids are an integral part of your life, so naturally you want to make sure those prospects will be able to connect with your sprouts and you and their offsprings will be able to mesh together. Continue reading The “Playdate” Date! What to Expect!

10 Harsh Truths Your Husband’s Prostitute Wants You To Know

This was an insightful and thought provoking article that I thought I would share. Originally on YourTango.com. Don’t Attack The Intermediary Messenger!  I welcome all of your comments and thoughts.
beach_body
As written by a prostitute.

I’ve had plenty of experience being the the other woman. As a promiscuous college student, I recall seducing a college baseball player with a long-distance girlfriend. Well, I eventually got sick of “giving it up for free” and figured I may as well get paid to play. After many years as a stripper, a dash of desperation, and gradually becoming more open-minded, I posted my first ad on a website for upscale escorts catering to sugar daddies. That’s right, I prostitute for a living. Here’s what I’ve learned in the process about your husbands:

1. Monogamy is against most men’s biological nature. But nest-building and settling down with one primary woman to raise a family is not. He’s chosen you, not me. He might see me as more fun, vivacious or sexual, but he sees you as the best candidate for wife, mother and life companion. He takes you seriously; not me.

2. Your partnership, in his eyes, has turned into more of an asexual friendship without the “benefits.” He still wants the benefits (as in the sex) but would rather seek out a willing mistress than rock the boat with you by expressing his frustration at your loss of interest in sex—or at least sex like it used to be.

3. He wants to have his cake and eat it, too. Social conditioning has enabled his feelings of male “have it all” entitlement. He still loves the hell out of you but male privilege dictates he can play around, get away with it and not be held accountable.

4I require less maintenance both emotionally and financially. I’m not a long-term investment. Whether I’m seeing him for money or seeing him just for fun, I’m his sidechick who is (sometimes painfully) at his beck and call for fantasy fulfillment as well as emotional support. Whereas you’re a full-time career with great benefits and insurance, I’m an hourly temp job.

5. He feels more comfortable telling me things he doesn’t have the confidence to admit to you. I’m basically a young, good-looking version of a therapist but unlike professionally-trained therapists, he gets to f*ck me. (That’s why in the case of escorting, my $500 per hour rate exceeds many of the nation’s best PhD holding psychiatrists and psychologists).

6. He can ask me to perform certain sexual acts that he doesn’t feel comfortable asking you to do. I don’t do anal sex, but I love giving oral, slightly rough sex, threesomes, a little role-play, and light BDSM.

7. He might be indulging an addiction, replacing an addiction or channeling his craving for other vices toward a different form of self-destructive behavior. If he has a history of gambling, alcoholism or drug addiction, it’s common for him to channel this pleasure-seeking energy toward me. He’s listening to his Id, not his super-ego, because he has a history of weakness toward seeking pleasure in excess.

8. He gets off on the risk. He might not even be seeing me for me at all because it’s about indulging in a thrill-seeking risk. Some guys try harder not to get caught but most men I’ve encountered love flirting with disaster a little bit, especially if he’s paying me hush-money. That way, his cocky ass feels extra confident I won’t go Fatal Attraction on him. He knows (and I know) painfully well that if you catch him in our affair, your female instinct will be to blame me for seducing him. But here’s a truthbomb: I’m not standing on a street corner, sipping a martini at the Four Seasons hoping to seduce him; he sought me out. But hey, go ahead and blame me if it helps you sleep at night, dear.

9. He’s got a Madonna-whore complex and puts you in the Madonna category. He doesn’t think of the mother of his kids in the same sexual way he may have during the hot and heavy early days. He’d rather have hot hotel sex with someone who asks little of him than boring, quiet missionary sex that’s subdued and quiet so to not wake up the kid. Also, I’m probably younger and better-rested than you are, with more energy to bring to our sexual encounters than just letting him hurry up and have sex with me until he comes to get it over with.

10. He’s got a savior complex. He feels good supporting me financially—to whatever extent he does—while also enjoying the ‘No Strings Attached’ sex arrangement. It’s mutually beneficial. He knows I’m jealous of the “main bitch” role but willing to settle for his sidechick beacuse I’m used to it. However, he exploits that desire and manipulates me emotionally. This is why so many men make false promises to leave their wives and take their mistresses on extravagant vacations.

At the end of the day, though, if your little boy gets a sniffle, he’ll ditch a romantic weekend getaway with me in a red hot second. And if you call to tell him he has to be home to let the plumber in between 2-5, he’ll cancel our 3 pm, $500/1 hour fling cause he doesn’t give a sh*t about me and he’s scared of your wrath. Basically, you have him whipped and I’m just a fun hobby he’s able to sacrifice when serious stuff comes up. (Yet, he easily forgets that as his mistress/escort, I may be relying on that appointment money to feed MY child as a singlemother or pay my tuition.)

V-Day Bliss for the Attached, Not-Yet-Defined and Single-

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Photo source: http://www.essence.com

Valentine’s Day is either the much-anticipated hot date of the year for the coupled-up or the much loathed and dreaded day by the single-dom. Valentine’s Day is a signal and reminder to the unattached that they are alone and not loved by a special someone. The men who are attached feel the pressure to step up their romance game or expect to hear about their lack of efforts for months on end, so to many it because a requirement rather than a genuine effort. Those that are entrapped in the non-exclusive relationships are filled with anxiety wondering if that new guy or gal or the one who has been around for a while will want to spend the designated day for lovers with them. Not to fret, despite your status there are plenty of ways to make your Valentine’s Day blissful.

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Photo Source: http://www.everythinggirlslove.com

The Happily or Not-So-Happily Singles:

Don’t sit at home watching re-runs of romantic comedies with a tissue box pondering on why you are alone on this date. Get out of the house. Arrange a date with your girlfriends- go out for cocktails and check out that new anticipated movie “Fifty Shades of Grey”. For the gents and ladies attend a Valentine’s Day Party for singles or a concert. There are an abundance of them. Getting out on the scene ramps up the possibility of meeting a potential that you can spend V-Day with next year. It sure beats staying at home.

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Photo Source: http://www.wallpoper.com

The Not-Yet-Defined:

Keep it light. You do not have to reserve a four-course dinner reservation, send flowers and splurge on an expensive gift. If not quite sure your “not-yet-defined” lover or mate is exclusive to only you, then arrange a less formal evening the night before or after V-Day. Enjoy each other’s company over after-work cocktails, watch a movie or have a two to three star restaurant meal. This lets the person know that they are cared for and you are accepting of the no boundaries relationship that currently exists. Let your not-yet-exclusive mate keep their V-Day open. If you are lucky maybe the two of you will get to spend two evenings with each other. If the relationship is still new, how about arranging a group gathering. An eventful evening out dancing with other co-ed friends is sure to be a great time.

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Photo Source: http://www.self.com

The Attached:

Now fellas you have once a year to show your “A” game (okay maybe twice, there is anniversary too). If you are in love with your woman, why not make this day and/or night exceptional. Now I understand everyone has different budgets. But you can have a special evening without breaking your wallet. A home-cooked meal and a bottle of wine is always wonderful. Follow that with a gift-wrapped box of pleasures that are soothing to your eyes and soft on her skin is always a win-win for both parties. Woman love romantic comedies and really appreciate a man who is willing to accommodate and watch a movie with them. A night out dancing, his and her massages are also great idea, followed by a great meal.

images (13)

Photo Source: http://www.allhiphop.com

Don’t Forget The Men:

While Valentine’s Day is known to be geared to the ladies, men need to feel appreciated too. While I feel the guy should be making the dinner reservations, the woman needs to make her man feel special. Make sure you reciprocate the generosity.  Be prepared with a  small gift and card. A bottle of cologne is always great.

Depending on the tenure of your relationship, determines the type of gift. The staple is at least a card. Do not show up empty-handed. A Valentine’s Day card whether humorous, sappy, or in-between is an ultimate requirement. The flowers and gifts are optional, but the card is a must. Now if you have some relationship history, splurge on the roses. She deserves them.

Reflecting on my most memorable V-Day moments, they were always the simple and creative ones. A fancy dinner is wonderful, but a home-cooked dinner or a picnic at a park has always been my favorite.

V-Day Bliss for the Attached, Not-Yet-Defined and Single…Which Are You? How Will You Spend V-Day? 

V-Day Bliss for the Attached, Not-Yet-Defined and Single- As Published on Joint Interest

Please read my contributing article as published on Joint Interest: Upload 2 The New Connected World Digital Magazine. Also sign up for weekly updates and look out for future contributions

download (9)

Photo source: http://www.essence.com

Valentine’s Day is either the much-anticipated hot date of the year for the coupled-up or the much loathed and dreaded day by the single-dom. Valentine’s Day is a signal and reminder to the unattached that they are alone and not loved by a special someone. The men who are attached feel the pressure to step up their romance game or expect to hear about their lack of efforts for months on end, so to many it because a requirement rather than a genuine effort. Those that are entrapped in the non-exclusive relationships are filled with anxiety wondering if that new guy or gal or the one who has been around for a while will want to spend the designated day for lovers with them. Not to fret, despite your status there are plenty of ways to make your Valentine’s Day blissful.

download (10)

Photo Source: http://www.everythinggirlslove.com

The Happily or Not-So-Happily Singles:

Don’t sit at home watching re-runs of romantic comedies with a tissue box pondering on why you are alone on this date. Get out of the house. Arrange a date with your girlfriends- go out for cocktails and check out that new anticipated movie “About Last Night”  starring scrumptuous Michael Ealy. For the gents and ladies attend a Valentine’s Day Party for singles or a concert. There are an abundance of them. Getting out on the scene ramps up the possibility of meeting a potential that you can spend V-Day with next year. It sure beats staying at home.

images (12)

Photo Source: http://www.wallpoper.com

The Not-Yet-Defined:

Keep it light. You do not have to reserve a four-course dinner reservation, send flowers and splurge on an expensive gift. If not quite sure your “not-yet-defined” lover or mate is exclusive to only you, then arrange a less formal evening the night before or after V-Day. Enjoy each other’s company over after-work cocktails, watch a movie or have a two to three star restaurant meal. This lets the person know that they are cared for and you are accepting of the no boundaries relationship that currently exists. Let your not-yet-exclusive mate keep their V-Day open. If you are lucky maybe the two of you will get to spend two evenings with each other. If the relationship is still new, how about arranging a group gathering. An eventful evening out dancing with other co-ed friends is sure to be a great time.

download (11)

Photo Source: http://www.self.com

The Attached:

Now fellas you have once a year to show your “A” game (okay maybe twice, there is anniversary too). If you are in love with your woman, why not make this day and/or night exceptional. Now I understand everyone has different budgets. But you can have a special evening without breaking your wallet. A home-cooked meal and a bottle of wine is always wonderful. Follow that with a gift-wrapped box of pleasures that are soothing to your eyes and soft on her skin is always a win-win for both parties. Woman love romantic comedies and really appreciate a man who is willing to accommodate and watch a movie with them. A night out dancing, his and her massages are also great idea, followed by a great meal.

images (13)

Photo Source: http://www.allhiphop.com

Don’t Forget The Men:

While Valentine’s Day is known to be geared to the ladies, men need to feel appreciated too. While I feel the guy should be making the dinner reservations, the woman needs to make her man feel special. Make sure you reciprocate the generosity.  Be prepared with a  small gift and card. A bottle of cologne is always great.

Depending on the tenure of your relationship, determines the type of gift. The staple is at least a card. Do not show up empty-handed. A Valentine’s Day card whether humorous, sappy, or in-between is an ultimate requirement. The flowers and gifts are optional, but the card is a must. Now if you have some relationship history, splurge on the roses. She deserves them.

Reflecting on my most memorable V-Day moments, they were always the simple and creative ones. A fancy dinner is wonderful, but a home-cooked dinner or a picnic at a park has always been my favorite.

V-Day Bliss for the Attached, Not-Yet-Defined and Single…Which Are You? How Will You Spend V-Day? 

10 things I wish I’d known before getting divorced

This morning I read this forthright article posted on NBC Today in the Health section which I found from HuffPostDivorce. A divorce mediator tells of her 10 things she was not prepared for in her own divorce which resonates not only with me but other divorcees. Continue reading 10 things I wish I’d known before getting divorced

A personal journey and pathway to minimize obstacles living as a divorcee

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