Tag Archives: divorce

Shenanigans

Shenanigans……

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I haven’t posted in awhile. I am about to fall upon my two year anniversary since I was officially divorced..and am at peace at the moment.

Why as you may ask haven’t I posted?

My mind has been spinning. I have been discovering myself. Finding my internal happy. Not supplemented by infatuation, masked by fake love by someone who is not really true. Continue reading Shenanigans

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11 Ways To Tell If A Guy Is Crazy About You! And Why He May Not Be There Yet!

Thought I would share this article from YourTango.com to all the ladies in the dating scene. Enjoy!
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And what to do if you have not gotten there yet!

Continue reading 11 Ways To Tell If A Guy Is Crazy About You! And Why He May Not Be There Yet!

Your 5-Step Guide To Becoming MORE Than Just A Friend With Benefits

I thought this was a great article on YourTango.com . Helpful tips for those who are in a Friends With Benefits situation and still respecting yourself and commanding respect from your partner. It is not always cliche….many relationships start off casually without any pressure yet evolve to a much more fulfilling one when both people are ready. And if timing is not in sync with your FWB refer to choice #1. Enjoy!
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If you can’t handle the heat, stay out of the bedroom.

Continue reading Your 5-Step Guide To Becoming MORE Than Just A Friend With Benefits

5 Brutal Truths About Loving A Taurus (As Written By A Taurus)

Hello it is Taurus Season!!! I am a Taurus to the core. Those who know me well…..know that I am all of these 5 Truths… Plus the Loyal part! That is always the Plus…if you can cope with the 5 truths. Thought I share this article I saw on YourTango.com
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The good, the bad, and the Taurus-ey.

Continue reading 5 Brutal Truths About Loving A Taurus (As Written By A Taurus)

The #1 Thing Smart Women Do To Attract (And Keep) Amazing Men

This was a great read from YourTango.com. I find myself absolutely guilty of being assertive and wanting to have control in relationships…which I will admit has not always left a positive outcome. Enjoy!

Continue reading The #1 Thing Smart Women Do To Attract (And Keep) Amazing Men

Know The Facts: 7 Sad-But-True Reasons He’s Going To Cheat On You

The topic of men and fidelity has been a topic I have been thinking a lot about lately…. The Main Chick vs. Side Chick Phenom is glaring in our faces through social media and entertainment outlets.  In the courting/dating stage, habits of the way men approach dating, tend not to wane until the engagement, make one or two a priority and have a couple of side chicks to call upon. I thought this article from YourTango.com was very insightful. Nothing that I was not aware of before, but organized in a great way to really put the whole Men and Fidelity into perspective. In a nutshell, A Man Is As Faithful As His Options. Beware of that Dreamy Charming Guy “The Hunter and Gatherer” make sure he has strength against temptation, while he may have good intentions there are always someone to test him. However, it goes both way for us women…but the reasons a woman cheats is very different from a man. Well enjoy!

Continue reading Know The Facts: 7 Sad-But-True Reasons He’s Going To Cheat On You

If There Is Nothing On This Finger You Don’t Get Claimed! Taraji Henson speaks to Steve Harvey!

Following the rapid success of Fox TV television series “Empire” coming to it’s first season finale, actress Taraji Henson visited the Steve Harvey show and spoke about her stance on relationships. Continue reading If There Is Nothing On This Finger You Don’t Get Claimed! Taraji Henson speaks to Steve Harvey!

TIMING!!!!

“Chemistry. If You Have Chemistry. You Only Need One Other Thing. Timing.”

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So I ask a guy friend: Why would you jeopardize a potential promising relationship with a woman that meets all of your requirements,   have an instant click with that has your best interest in mind?

His Answer: TIMING! Why would a guy stop his fun before he is ready for it to stop. There are plenty of fish in the sea….For a guy to stop his fun, he has to be ready for a relationship.

This is not the first time hearing this….

Last week a discussion with another guy friend. I wanted feedback on his experience with dating me….so I can find ways to improve myself.

His Feedback: Your a great person with wonderful qualities.

My Rebuttal: I have heard that from men before…If I have such wonderful qualities, why did we stop dating?

His Answer: TIMING!

Moral of the story: If you want an exclusive relationship with someone that will prosper into a happy ending. Ask the right questions. See where they are at in life, in terms of career, wanting a family and building an empire with someone.

Fact Check: Now I know men don’t want to hear this… If the guy is telling you what they want you to here….do your research. Pay attention to their actions. Consistency is key. Is he opening up about his life, is he bringing you into his life. Are you seeing the gent on the weekends and weekdays?

Demand Honesty: You do not want to be the chick on his “Rotation Belt of Women”. A true dude will tell you if he is in search of a relationship or not. It is up to you to want to continue to pursue more from him than what he is willing to give or just move yourself from his Chess Game and develop a platonic friendship.

Many times when you meet a great gent that shows genuine interest but doesn’t want to pursue a relationship, it really is all about “TIMING”.

The “Playdate” Date! What to Expect!

As a divorcee with kids, your dating prospects includes those with and without kids.  Your kids are an integral part of your life, so naturally you want to make sure those prospects will be able to connect with your sprouts and you and their offsprings will be able to mesh together. Continue reading The “Playdate” Date! What to Expect!

10 Harsh Truths Your Husband’s Prostitute Wants You To Know

This was an insightful and thought provoking article that I thought I would share. Originally on YourTango.com. Don’t Attack The Intermediary Messenger!  I welcome all of your comments and thoughts.
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As written by a prostitute.

I’ve had plenty of experience being the the other woman. As a promiscuous college student, I recall seducing a college baseball player with a long-distance girlfriend. Well, I eventually got sick of “giving it up for free” and figured I may as well get paid to play. After many years as a stripper, a dash of desperation, and gradually becoming more open-minded, I posted my first ad on a website for upscale escorts catering to sugar daddies. That’s right, I prostitute for a living. Here’s what I’ve learned in the process about your husbands:

1. Monogamy is against most men’s biological nature. But nest-building and settling down with one primary woman to raise a family is not. He’s chosen you, not me. He might see me as more fun, vivacious or sexual, but he sees you as the best candidate for wife, mother and life companion. He takes you seriously; not me.

2. Your partnership, in his eyes, has turned into more of an asexual friendship without the “benefits.” He still wants the benefits (as in the sex) but would rather seek out a willing mistress than rock the boat with you by expressing his frustration at your loss of interest in sex—or at least sex like it used to be.

3. He wants to have his cake and eat it, too. Social conditioning has enabled his feelings of male “have it all” entitlement. He still loves the hell out of you but male privilege dictates he can play around, get away with it and not be held accountable.

4I require less maintenance both emotionally and financially. I’m not a long-term investment. Whether I’m seeing him for money or seeing him just for fun, I’m his sidechick who is (sometimes painfully) at his beck and call for fantasy fulfillment as well as emotional support. Whereas you’re a full-time career with great benefits and insurance, I’m an hourly temp job.

5. He feels more comfortable telling me things he doesn’t have the confidence to admit to you. I’m basically a young, good-looking version of a therapist but unlike professionally-trained therapists, he gets to f*ck me. (That’s why in the case of escorting, my $500 per hour rate exceeds many of the nation’s best PhD holding psychiatrists and psychologists).

6. He can ask me to perform certain sexual acts that he doesn’t feel comfortable asking you to do. I don’t do anal sex, but I love giving oral, slightly rough sex, threesomes, a little role-play, and light BDSM.

7. He might be indulging an addiction, replacing an addiction or channeling his craving for other vices toward a different form of self-destructive behavior. If he has a history of gambling, alcoholism or drug addiction, it’s common for him to channel this pleasure-seeking energy toward me. He’s listening to his Id, not his super-ego, because he has a history of weakness toward seeking pleasure in excess.

8. He gets off on the risk. He might not even be seeing me for me at all because it’s about indulging in a thrill-seeking risk. Some guys try harder not to get caught but most men I’ve encountered love flirting with disaster a little bit, especially if he’s paying me hush-money. That way, his cocky ass feels extra confident I won’t go Fatal Attraction on him. He knows (and I know) painfully well that if you catch him in our affair, your female instinct will be to blame me for seducing him. But here’s a truthbomb: I’m not standing on a street corner, sipping a martini at the Four Seasons hoping to seduce him; he sought me out. But hey, go ahead and blame me if it helps you sleep at night, dear.

9. He’s got a Madonna-whore complex and puts you in the Madonna category. He doesn’t think of the mother of his kids in the same sexual way he may have during the hot and heavy early days. He’d rather have hot hotel sex with someone who asks little of him than boring, quiet missionary sex that’s subdued and quiet so to not wake up the kid. Also, I’m probably younger and better-rested than you are, with more energy to bring to our sexual encounters than just letting him hurry up and have sex with me until he comes to get it over with.

10. He’s got a savior complex. He feels good supporting me financially—to whatever extent he does—while also enjoying the ‘No Strings Attached’ sex arrangement. It’s mutually beneficial. He knows I’m jealous of the “main bitch” role but willing to settle for his sidechick beacuse I’m used to it. However, he exploits that desire and manipulates me emotionally. This is why so many men make false promises to leave their wives and take their mistresses on extravagant vacations.

At the end of the day, though, if your little boy gets a sniffle, he’ll ditch a romantic weekend getaway with me in a red hot second. And if you call to tell him he has to be home to let the plumber in between 2-5, he’ll cancel our 3 pm, $500/1 hour fling cause he doesn’t give a sh*t about me and he’s scared of your wrath. Basically, you have him whipped and I’m just a fun hobby he’s able to sacrifice when serious stuff comes up. (Yet, he easily forgets that as his mistress/escort, I may be relying on that appointment money to feed MY child as a singlemother or pay my tuition.)