Tag Archives: metropolitan

These Heaux’s Ain’t Loyal! Really?

There is much discussion on R&B/ Pop singer Chris Brown’s popular song “These Hoes Ain’t Loyal! Many men praise the song and women scowl at the chorus.  Chris Brown’s catchy song basically insinuates that a woman would leave a broke man for a rich man who wants her as depicted in the video below.

Warning: Explicit language

Continue reading These Heaux’s Ain’t Loyal! Really?

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All Or Nothing: I Will Not Be Any Man’s Half-Time, Down-Time, Spare-Time Or Sometimes

Thought I share this article from elitedaily.com. Thought the article conveyed the current state of women’s frustration with dating and was uplifting as a reminder there are plenty of fish at sea. Enjoy!

This is for all the women who’ve ever been second to “GTA,” a pick-up game of basketball, and the strip club on 61st and 10th. It’s for every girl who has ever felt used, cheated or under-appreciated. It’s for every woman who has been put in a slot and taken out only when he was ready to play.

It’s for all the people who have ever felt like they were making a priority out of someone who only saw them as an option.

If he tells you upfront that he can’t commit to you, then it’s on you, right? You shouldn’t have asked for something he couldn’t give. You shouldn’t have assumed that he wanted to give you his full attention. You shouldn’t have been so goddamn needy. Continue reading All Or Nothing: I Will Not Be Any Man’s Half-Time, Down-Time, Spare-Time Or Sometimes

“Flag On The Play” Book Review and Introduction To The Type Of Mr. Right Nows To Avoid- My Insights!

The other day I read this quick read book titled “Flag On The Play- A Woman’s Guide To Finding Mr. Right In A World Full Of Right Nows” written by Dena Reid Esq. with Mandee Burgess who is also one of the creators of the social website CodeRedFlag.com. I truly thought it was a great quick read, insightful and allowed me to reminiscence on certain signs I have encountered through my dating life that I fell for or my girlfriends  have in the past and present and caution me on certain actions from prospective gents. The book provides thorough analysis of several real-life scenarios where the author and reader point out signs from the gent’s actions that indicate he may not be “Keeper Material”

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The book breaks down 10 characters a woman should avoid:

1) Mr. Hudson River Valley: Separated Means Married– Whoa! I seem to run in these guys everywhere.  I remember meeting a guy who was going through a divorce in my mid-20’s..I didn’t know where Continue reading “Flag On The Play” Book Review and Introduction To The Type Of Mr. Right Nows To Avoid- My Insights!

Just One Of Those Days- The 4th of July Weekend Child Custody Battle!

Now I advocate fostering a positive co-parenting relationship. For the most part I get it right. But there are times I become completely frustrated. The battle of managing our parenting with our newly “fabulous” single lives. Continue reading Just One Of Those Days- The 4th of July Weekend Child Custody Battle!

OK Cupid! Optimism in Online Dating!

So I have further ventured out in online dating. A few days ago I signed up for OKCupid! a free online dating site. Prior to that I was only using one source for the past couple months eHarmony- a paid online dating site.

A co-worker who was divorced recommended me to try online dating and thought eHarmony would be good. Her stance was that she met her second husband there, and thought the selection of mates were reputable. Basically, men willing to pay for an online service, weeds out the gents that are on there for just games. Continue reading OK Cupid! Optimism in Online Dating!

America’s Perpetual Bachelor-George Clooney is Engaged? Say What?

 

According to People.com, George Clooney is retiring from the bachelor life. George Clooney and girlfriend, accomplished British attorney Amal Alamuddin are engaged. Sources confirmed that the pair were spotted with friends where Amal was sporting a pretty nice rock on her left ring finger. Amal is 36 years old and George is 52 years old. Continue reading America’s Perpetual Bachelor-George Clooney is Engaged? Say What?

Takeaways from Season Premiere of “Being Mary Jane” Playa Playa, TMI and Scandal

The season premiere of “Being Mary Jane” aired on BET January 7th, 2014 Tuesday evening. Mary Jane played by actress Gabrielle Union is a news anchor who is successful, independent and a “single black female” searching for love. From watching the premiere, I am definitely looking forward to the next episode. The episode oozes juicy from beginning to end. Continue reading Takeaways from Season Premiere of “Being Mary Jane” Playa Playa, TMI and Scandal

Preparations for Holiday Cheer as a Happily Divorcee! Salute!

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December is my favorite month of the year. My inner child jumps out and starts to count down the 25 days to Christmas, embrace the festivities of Kwanzaa and listen to the stories of Hanukkah celebrations from my Jewish friends. I am just as eager for Santa Claus coming to town, holiday cookies, Christmas tree trimming, watching Home Alone, It’s A Wonderful Life, A Christmas Story, and Santa Claus series movies on television as my sprouts. I am equally excited over the adult holiday party social gatherings.  Holiday parties are the best as everyone looks forward to the annual gatherings and is the time you can blame your excessive alcohol intake to the joys of giving.  I prepare myself to the many holiday work lunch feasts, after-hour holiday parties, gift exchanges, and most importantly paying gratitude to those who provide service and love to you year-round.

This is the first holiday season where my status will be single. I plan to embrace my singleness while festive in holiday spirit. No sense on dwelling in the past where I always had a date to share my holiday experiences. My electronic RSVP’s will be for just one. Any plus one’s will be reserved for one of my fellow single girlfriends.  It is time to maximize my exposure and what better time than the month of December.

Hello New York City! Introducing me, the fiery firecracker, independent, charismatic, hilarious super woman and mother of two.  Oh and by the way, I am single! And…I can’t tell you how long that status will be…..so get to know me now….as my window for meeting new people is narrowing as we speak. I will strut and exude holiday fumes of gingerbread, peppermint, and pine from my outer presence. As I plan to be fully decked in holiday essence.

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I will sip my spiked eggnog, hog out on the ham, wear my most sexy festive holiday outfit, dance to my favorite holiday classics like Run DMC’s “Christmas in Hollis” and reserve special moments under the mistletoe for the fellas that are deemed worthy. Afterall I am a Happily Divorcee!

I will not let my spirits damper reflecting on past holiday traditions. It is time for new experiences and opportunities. Tis is the time to celebrate the ending of a challenging year, reflect on your blessings, cherish the wonderful people who remain in your life and look forward to new beginnings. Fill your pathway with Joy, Peace and Happiness as we enter into 2014.

I say Cheers! Salute! A La Votre! Saude! Salud! Tos! Prosit! to good times for all. Enjoy your holidays! Merry Christmas! Happy Kwanzaa! Happy Hanukkah! Feliz Navidad! Joyeux Noel! Froliche Weihnachten! Feliz Natal! I look forward to sharing all of my holiday experiences with everyone this month….Stay Tuned!

New Thanksgiving Traditions…Gobble! Gobble!

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As Thanksgiving approaches tomorrow, I reflect on who and what I am deeply thankful to and for.  So far 2013 has been a year of rapid changes, new beginnings and bittersweet endings. I am blessed, that through all the transition, I had friends, family and my own strength to persevere. I have remain grounded with sanity in check for the most part. I was able to channel my few inner crazy chick moments to positive ventures…such as the creation of this blog.

This year will be the first where the kids, my ex-husband and myself will not celebrate together.  I plan to make sure this Thanksgiving holiday will be just as memorable as others. Tomorrow the kids and I will have Thanksgiving in South Jersey with my family. I am saved from doing all the cooking this year, but plan on bringing a few of my specialty dishes. Following our return from the family feast, the kids will be traveling with their father to visit his family in Connecticut. In prior years, Black Friday we would begin the festive Christmas activities, visit Santa Claus at the Herald Square Macy’s, window shop and view the animated Christmas themed windows at the high-end department stores on 5th Avenue and take pictures with the Rockefeller Center’s Christmas tree as our backdrop.  This was typically followed with a drive to visit my ex’s family in Connecticut.

This weekend I will have to myself. I have not yet figured how I would spend those days to myself. However, I decided to establish a new tradition. Today on Thanksgiving Eve, the children and I will attend a Broadway musical. Both of my kids share my appreciation of Broadway plays. This idea came about as I was pondering on how I would spend the day, while working from home with the sprouts tearing the house apart.  I decided to splurge and get 3 Orchestra seat tickets to Annie. A treat to myself and to the kids.  I am elated.  I love Broadway plays and musicals, which was never shared by my ex-spouse. Between tonight’s play and tomorrow’s feast, I could not be more content of my new Thanksgiving tradition. I am blessed to have a supportive family and two wonderful kids whom I can share this holiday with. I plan to attend a Broadway play every year. If we decide to travel a given year, I may have to alter the tradition a bit. I cannot be more blessed this year. Happy Thanksgiving to everyone! Gobble! Gobble!

As Published On Joint Interest Digital Magazine: Will And Jada: Is Their Marriage In Trouble? Who Is Margot Robbie?

Please read my contributing article as published on Joint Interest: Upload 2 The New Connected World Digital Magazine. Also sign up for weekly updates and look out for future contributing articles as well.

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Photo Credit: www.usmagazine.com

When Does a Platonic Friendship with the Opposite Sex Threaten Your Relationship with Your Significant Other?

Last week US Weekly, reported that Will Smith allegedly cheated on Jada Pinkett Smith with his co-star Margot Robbie from their upcoming movie “Focus”. The facts were based on silly pictures that they took together at a photo booth on-set. However, the pictures showed both of them sharing skin and undergarments. Now glancing at the pictures, one could assume that their professional on-set relationship seemed it was becoming a bit too close for comfort.

While we know from media and limited interviews of the couple that Will and Jada have a pretty solid and trusting relationship. They both have demanding careers, their children also work extensively, so there are periods where the two are separated for a considerable amount of time. The married couple has had their series of cheating allegations with former co-stars , rumors of an open marriage and numerous speculations that the two are on the brinks of divorce. Through it all, they both have stuck together and have remained classy in their approach of either ignoring or addressing the media’s curiosity.

However, upon looking at those pictures with Will and Margot Robbie,  I had to ask myself, would I be comfortable if my husband or “Boo” took pictures with a platonic friend intentionally sharing a considerable amount of skin? While initially, goose bumps started to rise on my skin and I began to shake my head no, while thinking “Hell No!”.  I also had to think perspectively on my experiences and look at their situation separately. I guess it would depend, right? If it was me, these questions would run through my mind. Have I been introduced to this lady friend of his? And if so, have we developed a somewhat platonic relationship amongst ourselves? Also how long has this platonic friend been part of my significant other’s life? Also, how well do I know my man, and how solid is our relationship? Now I know in show business, when working on a movie, you spend endless hours together over a short time span. So through that time period, close friendships are developed. I get it. While I may not have a Hollywood lifestyle, I could say this is similar in corporate America. Many times you have projects, strict deadlines and are required to work long hours with co-workers. Shared take-out dinners and long hours past 8 o’clock, co-workers become silly. We goof off. We sometimes end the night off at a local bar and maybe there is someone bold and daring enough to participate in karaoke. Silly occurrences happen, friendships develop and bonds are created.

If your significant other has an open communication and shares his life experiences with you including his bouts with his female platonic friends and your relationship is solidly grounded, any pictures on social media or other outlet should not affect you. In this situation, you are likely to know the occurrence or at least backdrop setting of when the alleged cheat rumors took place.

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Photo Credit: www.nydailynews.com

Thinking in my relationship experience, my significant others always had a few close platonic friendships. Some friendships were developed before I became involved with the person and others were developed afterwards through work or some other means. I am not going to say I always initially felt comfortable with these platonic friendships. But after open discussions on who this person was in his life and the type of mutual interest and care the two had for each other, I felt comforted. I remember, my ex-husband returning from a company retreat and there were pictures of him with other co-workers, that included females enjoying themselves at an after work function. Yes I had skepticism, but I could relate myself. As I have gone on plenty of company retreats in some of the most adulterated cities in America. My  co-workers and I would indulge ourselves at many of the great restaurants and entertainment available, but our bond was kept on a platonic level.  After open communication of his experiences with colleagues, I understood. In my opinion, open communication strengthens trust in a relationship.

Are you accepting of your significant other’s platonic friendships? If so, would you set boundaries around your significant other’s platonic friendships with the opposite sex? Would you question his or her sincerity towards you, if questionable but friendly photos were shared on social media at a function you were aware that he or she was attending? Would it matter if you knew that person before the photos were taken?